


Dearest, satellite

by Azureflowers



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Cheesy Confessions, How Beautiful The Moon Zine 2017, I'm so late posting this, M/M, not very subtle symbolism, now with space imagery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-25
Updated: 2018-07-25
Packaged: 2019-06-16 07:54:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15432453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azureflowers/pseuds/Azureflowers
Summary: Akira invites Mishima to the planetarium again to visit a special exhibition. Mishima is confused. Akira is ambitious.





	Dearest, satellite

**Author's Note:**

> I suddenly realized I had completely forgotten to publish this here! Wowww I'm dense.
> 
> You might want to check out [Luke Jerram's moon installation](https://my-moon.org/about/) before reading (or after, you do you) firstly because it's amazing and secondly because I was seriously inspired by it.

 

            [Kurusu]: _Wanna go to the planetarium tomorrow?_

Yuuki paused as he stared at the message he had just tapped open. He had been lying on his back on his bed, checking the Phantom Thieves Aficionado Website for new posts as usual, when the sudden invitation was delivered to his inbox. It was unusual. Usually Yuuki was the one who suggested activities like this, although he was always sure to include a mention of how the Phantom Thieves would profit from such an outing. After all, he didn’t want Kurusu to be weirded out by being invited to hang out without a solid justification, especially in such a date-y location… They had actually already visited the planetarium at Ikebukuro once on a PT-related mission, but the atmosphere had become somewhat strange when the “rumoured eccentric” they were supposed to identify turned out to be a friend of Kurusu’s.

(In fact, practically every time Yuuki tried to invite Kurusu to someplace more interesting than the stupid _diner,_ they ended up running into someone Kurusu knew. For someone who had just moved to the city less than eight months ago, Kurusu sure had managed to build an impressive social network…)

Yuuki shook his head to stop his mood from spiralling into some silly jealousy. His childish insecurities weren’t important now. He sat up and looked at the message again, hoping that the change of perspective would help him interpret the words. It didn’t really work, but then again there wasn’t that much to work with: just a simple question requiring a simple answer, short and to the point. Classic Kurusu.

At this point, Yuuki noticed the little icon at the corner of the screen that indicated Kurusu was online, most likely waiting for Yuuki’s reply. This realization immediately increased his stress levels, but he tried to remain calm.

Yuuki chewed on his lower lip as he considered what to write. He was well aware of his habit to ramble and spam Kurusu with several adjacent messages, but now he tried taking a leaf from Kurusu’s book instead.

            [You]: _I’d like that! When & where should we meet?_

Not bad, even if he said so himself. It wasn’t too cold, but not overzealous, either.

The reply came in under two minutes (during which time Yuuki was more fascinated by the three little bouncing dots than he would ever admit). It was again a very curt one, only containing the time and place of their rendezvous. No mention of a related Phantom Thieves mission or Phansite requests, no explanation that Kurusu had originally had plans to go with someone else who had cancelled, no context for Yuuki to piece together the actual purpose of the trip.

 

* * *

 

“So, I didn’t know you were that into this stuff?”

It was obvious from Kurusu’s blank stare that Yuuki’s conversation starter hadn’t been quite the success he had intended it to be. He tried again.

“You know, uh, space and all that?” he gestured vaguely towards the building ahead of them where the planetarium was. Kurusu cocked his head to the side thoughtfully.

“It’s cool, I guess,” he said after a short pause, “but I can’t say I’d usually care about it _that_ much.”

Yuuki was thoroughly confused now. That was the best explanation he had been able to come up with for the sudden invitation: that Kurusu-the-space-enthusiast had been itching to revisit the planetarium and just needed someone to join him. Maybe all of his friends were busy or just not interested in going after being dragged there too many times, or something.

“S-sorry, I just kind of assumed… you know, since we already came here during the summer holiday...”

Suddenly Kurusu flashed a mischievous smile.

“You mean the time you called Yusuke a weirdo to his face?”

“Don’t remind me,” Yuuki groaned, “that was so embarrassing! He must have thought I’m really rude…” He couldn’t help but press a palm on his face as they walked through the automatic doors into the ticketing area.

“I doubt you’re the first one who has had that kind of reaction to him… But he’s a good person once you get to know him,” Kurusu assured him before changing the topic. “Anyway, I wanted to come here again because I saw there’s a special exhibition that’s about to be closed soon. Here,” he grabbed two leaflets from a stand at the entrance and handed one of them to Yuuki.

“ _Unknown familiar – the hidden secrets of our Moon,_ ” Yuuki read, noting the good quality of the graphic design. No wonder Kurusu had been drawn to the exhibition if the advertisements were like this…

Admiring the marketing team’s success kept Yuuki occupied for just long enough that by the time he realised it, Kurusu was already handing cash for two student-priced tickets over the counter. He dismissed Yuuki’s protests by insisting that he was the one who had extended the invitation and Yuuki should just humour him. After eventually admitting defeat, Yuuki decided to give up trying to fathom Kurusu’s motivations and just go with it. With a sigh, he followed Kurusu to the temporary exhibition area.

The main exhibition hall was lit with gentle yellow and blue lights, creating a mysterious atmosphere. Although the number of attendees was by no means small, the hall was relatively quiet; people were speaking in hushed tones that faded into white noise together with the ambient strings playing in the background. Above their heads hung the piece de resistance – a huge scale model of the moon, faithfully representing the rugged surface of the real thing. Logically Yuuki knew there had to be wires holding the structure suspended, but he couldn’t escape the unreal feeling of watching the sphere seemingly float in thin air.

Unfortunately, the atmospheric setting had also brought in numerous couples, who seemed to constitute a significant portion of the visitor base. As he and Kurusu strolled around looking at the different exhibition stands, Yuuki found it a bit challenging to focus on the educational content when he kept noticing clasped hands and arms snaked around waists and _okay, those two weren’t even_ pretending _to be interested in the pictures of the moon craters…_

Yuuki sighed. What was he getting all worked up for? The fact that Kurusu had invited him here of all places didn’t mean anything, and he most definitely wasn’t expecting anything to happen, either. Honest to god, he was there just to have a good time, learning neat space facts with his friend-

“You’ve been looking at that for a while. What’s it say?”

Yuuki’s breath hitched in his throat when he heard Kurusu’s voice right next to his ear. Kurusu was standing behind his back, peering over his shoulder to look at the exhibition stand Yuuki had been next to while, er...spacing out. Yuuki commanded his brain to ignore the glaring fact that Kurusu was well in his personal space, and focused his attention to the text in front of him. Luckily, it was actually a bit interesting, so he didn’t have to feel like a complete fool for having stared at it.

“Uh…turns out the Moon has faster Wifi than our school.”

“Typical,” Kurusu clicked his tongue in mock disappointment, “they talk big about setting standards for technological advancement and yet it would take less time to send a selfie to space than to email a homework assignment to a teacher.”

“You mean _if_ they actually let us submit something not written by hand for a change,” Yuuki joined in, and they both laughed. Yuuki relaxed somewhat. Moments like these were just what he needed: laughing at silly quips and sharing memories of Sunday afternoons in the city.

Kurusu was looking at his pamphlet.

“It says they’re having a show in the small auditorium soon. Want to go check it out?”

The answer was obvious, and less than fifteen minutes later found them sitting in the extremely comfortable chairs, watching the stunning high definition footage and listening to the soothing voice of the narrator detailing the wonders of different eclipses involving the Moon.

In his soothingly low tones, the narrator explained how total solar eclipses were only possible due to the fact that the Sun was 400 times larger than the Moon, but also 400 times further away from Earth. If the proportion was even slightly different, the iconic halo effect would not occur. It was simply a cosmic coincidence, a happy accident.

Yuuki glanced at Kurusu sitting on his left. There were over 400 high schools in the greater Tokyo area, and somehow Kurusu had ended up in Shujin, in Kawakami’s class, in Yuuki’s life. The odds of that also had to be astronomical. It was such an insignificant little thing, and yet it had changed the trajectory of Yuuki’s life completely, giving him strength to make a difference in the world around him…

 

* * *

 

Inspired by the show, Yuuki felt the need to check the Phan-Site for news. He hadn’t looked at it since he had left home, but there wasn’t anything particularly interesting. It would have been nice to announce a new request to Kurusu while they were at it…

“It’s rude to look at your phone when you’re with other people.”

Yuuki’s eyes snapped up to give a guilty look at Kurusu, who was leaning his back on a railing. The exit of the small auditorium led to a narrow indoor balcony that overlooked the lower level of the exhibition while still offering a feeling of seclusion – a perfect place to take a break.

Kurusu’s expression softened when he saw Yuuki’s reaction. “I was kidding. Have you had fun today?”

“Yea-“ Yuuki’s voice squeaked a little at being caught off guard, and he remedied the situation by clearing his throat swiftly, “Yeah, it’s been great. Never thought the Moon would be so interesting. I’ve always thought that there are much cooler things in space, you know, like supernovas or black holes or planets where it rains acid all day long. Compared to those, the Moon seemed to be just this huge, lame piece of rock floating around, haha…”

Yuuki also leaned his back against the railing, making a deliberate effort to appear as laid back as Kurusu.

Kurusu didn’t laugh at his poor attempt at a joke. Instead, he was silent for a moment and then spoke slowly,

“Really? I always associate it with you…”

Huh? How was he supposed to interpret that? In any other context, Yuuki would have been certain he was being made fun of. The general flow of the conversation would seem to support that line of thinking, as well. But, when Yuuki turned his head to see Kurusu’s profile, there was no tell-tale glint in the eyes behind the glasses, no playful smirk to show the timing he was supposed to laugh. Kurusu did sometimes say weird things with a straight face, but somehow this was different.

“Uhh okaaay, what makes you think that? Is it how the Moon’s a barren place with no signs of intelligent life? Or how it’s so boring nobody has bothered to visit it in over 40 years?” Even Yuuki himself didn’t find the comparisons very funny – they were like something a grade school bully would come up with – but he had to find a way to lighten the mood. “Or maybe how it can’t actually shine on its own and just uses sun’s light to…appear brighter…” Yuuki’s voice trailed off. He was suddenly hyperaware of the weight of his phone in his pocket.

“That’s not it”, Kurusu’s voice cut through Yuuki’s bleak thoughts. He adjusted his position so that he was standing diagonally on Yuuki’s left, his right hand still holding on to the railing.

“It’s because the Moon is Earth’s closest companion, always orbiting it at a steady pace…”

Yuuki found himself frozen in place as his eyes locked with Kurusu’s. He realised that they were alone on the indoor balcony – closing time was nearing, and most of the remaining visitors were probably at the show currently being played at the large auditorium. The strings still continued to play their soft harmonies in the lower floor, and a blue-tinted light fell on Kurusu’s face as if it had been put there for that specific purpose. It made him look otherworldly.

“It’s hard to tell just by looking, but the Moon has some amazing powers,” Kurusu continued, “It makes the tide ebb and flow, and it keeps Earth’s axis stable in its place.” He seemed to be inching closer, or maybe it was Yuuki who was being pulled towards him? It was like Kurusu had developed his own gravitational field. Yuuki wouldn’t be surprised if even the replica moon looming above would snap off its invisible wires and crash on them.

Kurusu didn’t seem to be bothered by this prospect.

“The Moon is full of scars from all the meteors that crashed into it throughout the years. It can never erase those marks completely but even then, it can light up the night. I’ve been wondering…”

Yuuki briefly wondered if Kurusu was absorbing all the oxygen around them or if Yuuki just had forgotten how to breathe.

“…what would happen if the Moon and the Earth got a little…closer?”

Yuuki’s mouth felt completely dry. He stared into Kurusu’s intense eyes and tried to say something, anything.

“D-downstairs it said…that would cause some pretty extreme floods and…earthquakes…”

Kurusu paused. He blinked, twice. After a moment of supremely uncomfortable silence, he rolled sideways with a long exhale, disappearing from Yuuki’s field of view. When Yuuki turned his head to look at him, Kurusu was leaning fully on the railing again, looking away and running his fingers through his jet black hair awkwardly.

“…That…sounded a lot better in my head,” Kurusu muttered, “I wanted to impress you with something a bit more original, but it just came out weird. …Sorry, I guess I should’ve stuck to poetry or something.”

As Yuuki looked at Kurusu’s visibly embarrassed expression, the pieces began to click in his head. The seemingly pointless invitation, the chosen location, the strangely intense atmosphere just a moment ago…

Oh. _Oh._

Now that he had realised the situation, Yuuki began to panic. He felt like a lost space ranger who was drifting away from a ship that had come to his rescue, helplessly floating in the vastness of the universe now that he had squandered his chance.

He grabbed Kurusu’s arm and pulled the other boy closer so their position resembled the one they had been in just a moment earlier.

“Can we… try that again…?”

Kurusu’s face was thoroughly confused, but he didn’t try to move away.

“…Try what?”

“That thing you said just now…can you say it one more time?”  Yuuki wasn’t sure why it felt so important to recreate the moment that had clearly fallen flat. Maybe because he wasn’t still fully convinced he hadn’t imagined the whole scenario, or because Kurusu had spent time and effort thinking about this, thinking about _him_ , and the thought made Yuuki’s head reel. He desperately wanted to appreciate the gesture properly.

“What if…the Moon and the Earth were closer…?” Kurusu muttered. It was much less confident than the first time, now ridden with self-consciousness and uncertainty. Yuuki had always taken Kurusu for the kind of guy who just naturally exuded charisma, so it was almost a novel experience to see him like this – but he couldn’t afford to be distracted by that now. Yuuki swallowed and whispered,

“I definitely want to find out.”

The distance between them seemed to be shrinking again, but this time Yuuki didn’t feel like he was being moved by some external force. He was doing this, he was choosing this.

“What about the floods and earthquakes then?” Kurusu murmured, and his breath tickled Yuuki’s nose. Apparently, Kurusu had regained his footing enough to make jokes. Yuuki shook his head.

  
“We’re already dealing with changing the corrupt society. I’m not adding hypothetical natural disasters to the list of things I need to worry about.”

“…Fair enough.”

When their lips finally joined, Yuuki was still holding on to Kurusu’s forearm with one hand and Kurusu’s free hand was clasped around Yuuki’s. The kiss was rather chaste and had little movement, as if both were giving the other an opportunity to change their mind and pull away. When that didn’t happen, Yuuki squeezed Kururu’s warm hand and the kiss began to deepen gradually. And then…

_“We hope you have enjoyed the exhibition today. This is to inform all visitors that we are closing in fifteen minutes, and we ask you to proceed towards the exit. Have a pleasant evening and welcome again.”_

Kurusu broke the kiss and pulled away with a disappointed sigh, but made no move to unclasp his hand from Yuuki’s. He looked as giddy as Yuuki felt as he said,

“So…if you want to come over…”

Yuuki didn’t trust his voice, so he just nodded instead. The two boys turned their backs on the replica moon and made for the exit. Even as the fluorescent lights of the elevator signalled the inevitable return to Earth, to normalcy, to reality, their hands stayed intertwined for the entire ride.

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first zine experience and I loved it! The whole process was very well organised and everyone involved was super supportive. My time zone was kind of awkward and my life was a bit chaotic at the time so I couldn't interact with the other creators as much I would have preferred but overall it was great.
> 
> As for the piece itself, I feel like I went all out with the corn. Several times I paused and went "really boi, you gonna say that? with your actual mouth??" at Akira (true as it is, I find it hilarious he implied himself being an "Earth" that Mishima revolves around). I loved contrasting him with his super suave persona to his more genuine, awkward teenage self.
> 
> I did a lot of research for this but don't quote me on this stuff, especially the 400 or so high schools was such a great coincidence with the other tidbit that I couldn't leave it out even though I can't for the life of me find the source again.
> 
> PS: I finally got a chance to go back to Japan for the first time since my exchange year (it's been three years!) and I went to the Ikebukuro planetarium. ...Yeah, it's nothing like the one in the story hahaha. I was thinking of something a bit more like Nagoya science museum, which has GREAT planetarium shows btw.


End file.
